When I first thought of writing an article like this, I was having second thoughts because I know what a controversial topic this one can be. You see, many people have already been to or have been spammed by dating websites and “ How to pick up women “ e-books. There are just a ton of people trying to sell you something or rather. Can you blame them considering the current economical climate? Marketers out there have come to realize that no matter how much stuff there is out there about dating, there is still a starving market for this. The reason that these kind of materials still sell so well is because, GUYS STILL DON’T GET IT. Yep, you might be having a chuckle now about this but the fact is, deep down inside you, you know you’re just like the other members of the herd.
Very few males in our society have taken the “ blue pill “ so to speak, and have turned out to be successful with women, and happy in love. I am planning this article to be broken up into 5 parts, covering several factors which I deem important for you to understand. If there’s enough demand, then I shall gladly write more.
Before I go on, I want to be straight up with you. First up,if you found this article useful, or enjoyable, please vote for it and return a favor. Secondly, my writing style is straight to the point. I don't believe in beating around the bush, because if I don't give it up to you straight you won't learn a thing.
Right here we go. A bit of an introduction and background. I’m just a regular 32 year old straight male who resides in Sydney, Australia. I absolutely love Sydney. Why? Because there is just so much diversity and culture in this city. Diversity means, you can really funnel down and find what you really are looking for in terms of a partner ( or partners if you’re into that ). The point is, you have “choices”.
I’m an average looking guy, of average height, and nothing too outstanding. Just your regular Joe that you would not notice if I walked past you on the street. What you would not realize however, is that I am quite successful with women. I’m not a pimp, mind you. I have just reached a point where I’m more than satisfied with where I am.
At this point, you’re skeptical or might even think “ Gosh, this guy sure is cocky! “. Well, facts are facts. Think of it this way - If I wasn’t successful, wouldn’t you be wasting your time reading this article? That’s right. You are reading this because you are probably hoping that deep down inside, I am super successful and that I might just give you the key to winning this game. Whatever it is, read on and just make up your own conclusions. If I don’t really know what I’m talking about, you’ll realize it soon enough. You’re all smart people, so use your intelligence!
I know for a fact that many of you males out there have the same desires deep down. Some of you want to find love, some of you just want to be with as many women as possible. You all have your reasons. Some of you just want to keep trying till you find the shoe that fits you the best, one that you’re most comfortable with.
The problem is, a huge majority of men do not get that chance to try. A good analogy would be like..they kind of stumble around till they find a pair of shoes, or their friends hand them over a free pair of shoes to wear. Okay, I know…bad analogy, but you get my point. They walk into the shoe store and see all these great looking shoes, but they’re unable to try them on ( maybe because the shop assistant’s being a nasty person ).
Fear not, I’m here to help those of you who need it. That’s what this article was created in the first place. This is for the men ( ladies, this might apply to you too ), who need to gain a better understanding of the dynamics of dating.
I’ve not always been successful with dating though. Is that surprising? Well NO! Only a very small percentage of us are born with the natural charisma that attract the opposite sex like an over-sized magnet. Don’t we just hate them ? ( Grins ). It was around 2005 when I first realized that, my dating skills were non-existent.
Yes, dating like anything you do, is a skill. Being a writer, or a successful businessman, an actor, an athlete, all require that you develop specific skills in order to achieve success in your field - Dating is no exception. Those of you who are ignorant to this fact will just remain exactly the way you are. If you’re happy, then good for you. If you are not, and feel like you could use a different perspective then read on.
How did I realize that I had no dating skills? I have a little short story for you.
It was one night in 2004 (I should have started with " once upon a time, in a galaxy far far away...).
I was out with a couple of my male friends. We went to this bar and they had a pretty happening crowd. Loads of women, as well as men. Anyhow, after a couple of drinks my friends starting having bets. You know, the usual guy thing. “ I dare you $5 to walk up to girl and get her phone number “, my friend said as he took a sip of his Crown Lager. “
You’re out of your mind “, I replied with a smirk. “ You’re just a wuss, you can’t do it”, straightening his posture in a challenging tone. My male ego was at stake here. I looked around the room and picked out a rather largish girl who had the worst dress sense in the room. “ Fine, see that one? I’ll get her phone number, just to shut you up “, I retorted confidently. “ That one doesn’t count. Pick a really hot one “, he said with a huge grin on his face.
My eyes scanned the room quickly. At this point, something inside me gave way. There were loads of great looking women in the room, and I suddenly felt afraid. “ How was I going to do this? “ I thought to myself. They are not going to even bother with me if I went up and asked for a number. At this point, I convinced myself that it was probably better to admit cowardice and save embarrassment. Then, just as my eyes finished scanning the room I suddenly met eyes with a well-dress, young, and sweet-faced girl of asian background. She smiled warmly then broke eye contact to chat with her friend. My heart leaped and I once again regained what little confidence I had left in me. “ Aha! I’ve found an easy target “ - I told my friend.
I did some pre-planning in my head of what I was going to say. I was going to walk up to her, tell her she had the most gorgeous eyes and sexiest smile I’ve ever seen, and then ask for her name. Well, I walked up to her, and proceeded to the men’s room. Suffice to say, nothing else happened that night. It was this day that I realized that I needed help. I had to drop my ego for once, and find a solution to this problem.
During my quest to find out how to be successful with women, I discovered that there were certain traits in a character that deemed one “charming”- something women always love. What are the prerequisites of charm you ask?
Well, I’ve narrowed it down to several factors. Personality-wise, this consists of being confident ( this number one ), having a sense of humor, being consistently positive in life, and that small touch of that “ cool-factor “. Other than that, there are no further magical secrets or tactics to getting women to find you magnetically attractive! It’s a fact and don’t let any other dating course or e-book tell you otherwise. You’re just wasting your time and money, destroying your confidence and as a result ending up more confused than ever.
To help you keep this in perspective, I’ve developed a little concept I call “ The Four Zens of Success “. If you posses these 4 traits in your character already, then I’m certain that you’re not only successful with women, you would be successful with men, your career and life in general. I will now give you a short breakdown of each of these factors and explain why they are important.
Confidence
What is confidence? Confidence is merely being self-assured, knowing that you can do certain things and not fail at it. It is the pivot point between being happy and successful in life and failing in everything. Possibly driving yourself into a state of depression. Why do women just love confidence? Simple, because it gives them the feeling of security, and that you are mentally strong, you know what you’re doing all the time, and that YOU ARE A MAN. Yep, confidence is sexy - Ask ANY woman and they’ll tell you that. Confidence from a male perspective has the same effect as a woman wearing a belt for a skirt and knee high leather boots!
Sense Of Humor
“ What? You are telling me to be a clown? ”. Not exactly my friends. You see, sense of humor these days is a very rare trait indeed. You’ve seen guys out there at bars acting like monkeys just to get a girl’s attention. In my opinion, that is very “ high school ” and we shouldn’t need to lower ourselves to that level. The girls don’t find these types of guys attractive at all most of the time, and merely use them as a form amusement. Increasing their social value in the eyes of others.
A good analogy would be like you going to the zoo, and seeing some chimpanzees doing tricks and gaining lots of entertainment value. This won’t make you want to go home with the chimpanzee though ( And if you do, I don’t want to know okay ? ).
What I mean by sense of humor is not having an arsenal of jokes either. If you do, all the better, but most of us weren’t born Eddie Murphy. You need a natural sense of humor. Something that you should already possess and don’t try to hard to be too funny. One strange thing you will notice is, as a girl begins to find you more attractive, she will start to laugh with anything you say. That is a good sign! It means that she’s trying to let you know that she likes what you’re doing or saying and you should continue doing just that!
When you’re with a woman whom you want, just try and be more outgoing and fun. FUN, is a huge factor. Fun turns into attractiveness over time. I can’t really say why this is, but it is something I’ve noticed in my own journey. It’s like a drug and is extremely addictive, especially in today’s society where everyone’s so stressed out over earning money, and running the “ rat race “. No one has time for real fun anymore. If you can offer that, you’d have tons of customers!
Thank you for being a great audience! You’ve made it to the end.
This is the end of Part 1 of the article. Stay tuned for Part 2 where I will be giving you more examples of being fun and also covering the other Zen’s of Success. Remember, if you want to see more of this, you will need to vote for this article.
Till next time,
The Dating Pill
